Whitehall is not simply a collection of government offices; it is a highly centralised administrative system with its own incentives, institutional memory, and concentration of power. This article argues that a federal Britain cannot survive while that machinery remains intact, and proposes replacing the unitary civil service with a geographically dispersed network of regional and metropolitan administrations. Departments are rooted where their work actually happens, the Treasury is relocated away from London, specialist expertise replaces perpetual bureaucratic rotation, and an independent scrutiny system makes government radically more transparent. The result is intended to be a state that is less concentrated, more locally knowledgeable, more resilient to failure, and ultimately more accountable to the people it serves.